Re: Survival - New and Improved Weaponry

From: tschibasch <tschibasch_at_yahoo.com_at_hypermail.org>
Date: Tue, 30 Jul 2002 05:13:42 -0000

--- In OliveStarlightOrchestra_at_y..., "HiramGonash" <okfreddy_at_h...>
wrote:
> > Plus, wouldn't you LOVE to be the designated machine-gunner, and
get
> to
> > spray John's silly East Germany border-guard uniform with red-dye
> bullets?
> > I know I would...
>
> I just wet my pants with that thought.
>
> Out in God's green...the smell of sage and rosemary.
>
> Silence. And then...
>
> The snap of a twig.
>
> And another.
>
> A branch breaks.
>
> The sound of a body falling into a bush, crawling out, tripping
over a
> log.
>
> Your finger tightens on the trigger. You slow your
breath. "Squeeze,
> don't pull."
>
> Who will it be? Who's your victim?
>
> The stumbling gets closer. Animals run for shelter at the
increasing
> noise.
>
> Who is making enough noise to raise the dead?
>
> And then you see him. Sgt. Schultz? No, it's John tromping around
in
> his East German Border guard uniform. 110 degrees and he's bundled
> like a baby in a nappie.
>
> You do what is humane; what is required.
>
> With a yell you raise up from your ant-infested hiding place and
spray
> him with your genuine replica Uzi, coloring his uniform a solid
> yellow.
>
> "Oh bother," he says looking at you quizzically. "Was I making a
bit
> too much noise? At least I'm dressed well."
>
> Life is good.

This is ridiculous! This is NOT AT ALL what the game was like!

Please read the following account. The scenario is as follows: There
is a complex of underground tunnels at Nicholas Flats. We have
carefully installed heat sensitive equipment all over the hills, so
that we know where everyone is. In my air-conditioned station
undergound, I watch people through infrared monitors, making careful
calculations as to their next move...

As I put the "Robusto" Cohiba down on the crystal ashtray, my arm
briefly brushes against one of my many medals. Using the sattelite
camera, I spot a bunch of bushes, behind which are Dean and Mike.
They are arguing. I electronically intercept their argument:
Basically, Mike has to take a leak, and told Dean to watch the fort.
Dean, on the other hand, keeps asking Mike if he can watch Mike while
he's taking his leak. Mike insists that they cannot let their guard
down, even for a moment, and that Dean should pay attention to other
things. But Dean won't have any of it! Sounds like poor Mike just
wants a little privacy!

I listen to this banter go on for about three minutes, and then sip
at my single malt scotch. I sigh.

Finally, I push a small red button next to a speaker.

"Yes, sir?" a voice barks back at me.

I pause, looking at one of my golden medals, and then say "You see
Dean and Mike... up on sector three."

"Yes, sir, we see them there, sir!" the voice responds.

I puff again at my cigar... "Wipe them out with the cobra assault
canon."

"Yes sir, at once, sir!" the voice barks back again, "over and out!".

I then lean back on my suede chair to let the three Swedish massueses
get a better grip on my back. I continue to watch the screen, until
the picture goes blank. A direct hit!

John
Received on 2002-07-29 22:13:46