An amusing little tale...

From: tschibasch <tschibasch_at_yahoo.com_at_hypermail.org>
Date: Tue, 02 Dec 2008 01:55:44 -0000

I especially like the 'twist ending':


http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/articlemc.aspx?cp-
documentid=12234956&GT1=32023


Confessions: I Cyber-Stalked His Ex

My ex-boyfriend's ex-wife is a 29-year-old, 5-foot-9 costume
designer and lover of whiskey, Hitchcock, and Lena Horne. She's
agnostic, wants children someday, and has a ruby-lipped smile. How
do I know all this? I cyber-stalked her.

When my boyfriend and I had just started dating and he told me that
he and the ex-wife had remained pals, I innocently cruised over to
his MySpace profile to see what I could find out. I scrolled through
his friends, and then I found her. "No, no: We'd agreed spaghetti is
evil!" read a comment she'd posted on his profile where everyone in
his network could see the inside joke.

I logged off and tried to quell my rising jealousy with the reminder
that he was no longer with her — he was with me. But as time went
on, our relationship started to founder, and the more I felt
incompatible with him (he was ready to leave New York; I wasn't),
the more I kept hunting for info on whom he'd once been compatible
with. Cyber drive-bys turned into a full-scale scouring of her
online photo albums. MySpacing turned into Googling.

Eventually, I found her last name, what shows she'd worked on as a
designer ... I had just enough scraps of information to construct an
identity for this woman I'd never met. My ill-gotten knowledge
enriched every word my boyfriend said about her, although he didn't
talk about her much. "Know-it-all" became "enchantingly
brilliant." "Ambitious" meant the show she'd worked on won a
Tony. "Incompatible" was code for "except in bed" — that sultry
vixen with legs up to her chin. Soon, I was totally fixated on her.

Of course, we all have pasts. It's just that 10 years ago, our exes
lived in piles of dusty photos buried in shoeboxes. MySpace lured me
into thinking I could unlock the grand mystery of my boyfriend's
last relationship. If I looked hard enough, clicked on enough
pictures, scanned enough comments, I'd be able to find the real
reason they'd split, what really turned him on, what power she'd
really had over him ... and maybe why it wasn't working with us.

I never did, of course. If they couldn't figure out their
relationship, how could Google?

Eventually, we broke up, and I told him about MySpacing her. He
paused, then said, "She did the same to you."
Received on 2008-12-01 17:55:49

This archive was generated by hypermail 2.3.0 : 2020-02-04 07:16:26 UTC